I have this thing I need help with. I can 'read' people's emotions, thoughts and stuff from a mere glance. Trouble is though I can only do it with people that are strangers to me. Once I've allowed any one person to become a part of my energy it gets to a stage where there is no distinction between my own and theirs and then once the person is no longer unfamiliar I lose this ability towards them. It is only under extremely strenuous circumstances that I can regain it towards that particular person again. I also quite regularly have the most vivid dreams , and they manifest quite often. I feel weary and overloaded sometimes and then I wonder if it's worth it? In South Africa this thing is not talked about understand? Is there a way to channel this energy and make it manageable and less haphazard? I consciously work on shutting this thing off because it opens up doors to planes and realms that untutored minds have no place being. I even had a visitation from Old Lu himself on one occasion when I was younger and didn't know yet how to protect myself.
Help someone please if you can. I am vulnerable ALL the time and I know I need to become stronger if I'm to survive. I am so very weary of being exposed like this. My feet are planted too firmly on the ground for me to know how to handle this. I guess what scares me is that I can't control the images and torrent of thoughts and emotions that get thrown at me all the time. And the WORST aspect is that I react instinctively and throw back my own energy at whomever and that's when things start going wrong. It grows stronger every day. I know I would not be who I am without it but I need a measure of control over this thing. Or at least SOME relief.
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